Anatomical conversations…

Every evening I decide to post on my blog, yes this blog and not the other one ( I am quite frequent out there…uhh..currently!!), but I end up not posting anything new. What happens right after I come back home from office is as below:

My brain: “ Switch on the computer and check if there are any new posts, any new followers, any new comments.  Check both the blogs. Check out other blogs where a comment has been left and reply is awaited.”

My hands: “We are tired of using the keyboard the whole day. We need some rest.”

My eyes: “Same here. We too need some rest.”

My heart(always an optimist): “I am sure there are new comments, new followers, blah, blah blah. We can just sneak in and check once.”

My eyes and my hands revolt.

My brain and my heart don’t care.

After logging in,

My heart: “First, let us see BowTie :)”

All of them agree. After being there for sometime and being disappointed:

My brain: “Now let us go to Thoughtless”

My eyes: “No………………………I can’t take myself off BowTie!!”

My hands(still revolting): “Am tired guys(oh sorry girls).”

Who cares??

It is navigation to Thoughtless from BowTie :).

My brain: “We need a post soon.”

My heart: “But I currently don’t have anything close to me that needs to be shared.”

My eyes: “Uhh..brightness hurts.”

My hands: “Lets go.”

My brain and my heart: “Lets go to IndiBlogger and see what is happening.”

An hour or so on IndiBlogger, talking and chatting on the forum.

My brain and my heart: “Lets work on the new post. Before that, let us post something on BowTie :) . ”

My eyes and my hands:“Can we come back tomorrow?”

As always, heart and brain don’t listen.

After posting on BowTie, interruption.

My Ears: “I can hear somebody yell from the kitchen.”

My mouth and my stomach : “We need to get to work.”

All of them agree.

After dinner, back on the system.

My heart and my brain: “Let us see what other bloggers are upto . Then we’ll post on Thoughtless.”

My hands and my eyes: “Not again.”

After surfing and checking out and commenting on others’ blogs.

All of them: “Lets come back tomorrow. We all need rest.”

New post goes down the drain!!!

PS: I am out of my senses to post something like this. But, since my hands, even after being so tired, typed all this, I posted it anyways. I hate..I hate this post!!!

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How to create a traffic jam when it comes to your blog traffic.

Friends: Friends come in handy when you are new to blogging and even afterwards. Pester them, blackmail them, bribe them. Do not worry much about CBI/Lokayukta/Lokpal(incase it gets accepted) because they all are currently busy with their own issues. In case the above said ideas don’t work, then just use the tried and tested method which is “Tum apne dost ke liye itna nahi kar sakthe? ( Can you not do even this much for your friend?)”. Make sure you add in a little melodrama when you ask them the above question. If you are bad at it, then you can take a course in it by watching any of the Saas-Bahu serials. Make sure you don’t overact. It can prove to be addictive.

After all, Har ek friend zaroori hota hain like Airtel rightly puts it.

Family: Once again, pester them, blackmail them and do not bribe them since you would be using their own money to bribe them in case you are still studying and if you are earning, they would feel like you are showing off. So no bribing. Puppy face can do the trick. If you are bad at making faces, most of them are not. In case you are among the selected few who are bad at making faces in general and puppy face in particular, then Google puppy face and see the expression and practice the same in front of a mirror. Practice makes a man perfect you know. Try it out, no harm.

After all, family comes first.

Facebook and Twitter: Thanks to these social networking sites, life has become so much more impersonal. Every Tom, Dick and Harry knows every other Eena, Meena and Deeka. Post all updates about your blog on these and ‘some’ people are so used to clicking on the ‘like’ and ‘share’ button that they would be tempted to click on it anyways even without reading the posts. Seeing the number of likes and shares, some actual reader might read your blog and so the job gets done anyway.

After all, sharing is caring.

Spread the word: Try talking about your blog to everyone you meet , so much so that the other person should get so irritated that he/she will want to have a look at your blog to see what is so special about it. Liking your blog, following it is secondary. Atleast, your page-view stats stand increased.

After all, Dimag ki dahi nikhalna is not a bachho ka khel.

Optimizing post titles using SEOs: Have post titles that have no relation to the actual post just for the SEO to work its magic. And tadaaa… your blog has a better rank in the web world irrespective of what you post.

After all, web is what you make of it.

Disclaimer: This is just a light hearted post. No reference to anyone anywhere.

Confession: I also have tried these tricks when I was very new to blogging.

Conclusion: The above said tricks do not work. If you are truly passionate about blogging and want ‘actual readers’ to read your blog and follow it, then there is ‘one and only, tried and tested and proven method’ - Write passionately. It will surely strike a chord somewhere. Till then, Happy Blogging.

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The Year Gone By…

My blog turned a year old today. The journey so far has seen a  lot of happy events,a little bit of downtime, but, has always been enjoyable.

When I decided to start my own blog, I thought it would be a child’s play since I had previously written for school and college magazines. But, I was wrong. Blogging is a different ball game altogether.I found posting regularly wasn’t easy. Time constraint, lack of topics, lack of will power didn’t help either.

It is a human tendency to be over enthusiastic when we start off with something new and then gradually the enthusiasm fizzles out. Same thing happened to me. I had to do something about it. I couldn’t leave my blog orphaned. Coming across IndiBlogger happened at the right time for me.Talking to other bloggers, reading their posts, getting my blog reviewed, receiving comments, increase in the number of followers gave me the push to continue blogging and also made me post regularly.

This post is just an excuse to thank all my readers, each and everyone of you. Also, thanks to IndiBlogger for providing the right platform for bloggers like me to connect with other like minded people. Thanks a ton guys :)

“Thoughtless Ramifications…” wouldn’t be what it is without all you wonderful people. Thanks again :)

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Curiosity killed the cat. Well, almost!!!

The cat...meow.

I have never had any major mishaps as a baby like most babies do . The reason being I found it a struggle to move around because I couldn't carry my own weight around(Look at the picture for proof). So, all I did was sit in one place and play. I never gave a reason for any mishap to occur. I know many mothers would love a baby like that.

After I grew a little older and my baby fat was lost after I started schooling, I have had my share of mishaps. One such episode is still very fresh in my mind.  I was five years old then  and used to come back home in the afternoon. My mum would then serve me lunch and  go in for her afternoon nap . There was no point of her waiting for me to finish my lunch since I would take a minimum of 3hrs to finish my food. I have been a troublesome child when it came to eating. So, on that fateful day, she served me Peas Pulav and went in for her nap.  

I sat in front of the TV, eating very slowly like I always did. Then , curiosity struck and I decided to measure the size of my nostrils. I looked around and found the pea to be the perfect tool for the task . I put the pea into one of my nostrils  and found it to be a perfect fit. I tried removing it when I realized it was time for my mum to wake up and she would scold me for doing such a thing. Then came the dreaded moment, the pea was stuck . Due to my breathing, I had pushed the pea further up my nose. When my mum woke up and came to me, she found that there was something fishy by the way I was acting. On enquiring, I blurted out the incident and she grew panicky. She tried all measures to remove the pea but all her efforts failed. The sneeze never came nor did I cough. I could still breathe with one nostril but after sometime I started feeling a little breathless, more so because of the fear of dying young. Finally, my mother took me to my neighbour’s house and the pea was finally removed after a lot of efforts.  

From that day onwards, I swore to myself that I would never experiment such a thing on myself or on others. I have been pretty harmless since then.

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Music to the ears…

I spend a lot of time travelling to and back from office and during all  these times, the radio on my phone has been one humble companion. I like it better than my music player. Radio has its own charm. A typical weekday starts with me hopping into a bus and plugging my ears with the earphones and tuning into one of the radio stations.

The radio has always proven to be a loyal companion since my college days. I feel listening to the radio is like being with a person who understand your emotions very well. It has always cheered me up with lovely songs when I have needed them the most. It has made me realize the meaning of life by playing the touching, soulful songs. It has also made me sad by playing  songs that can make me cry every time I listen to them. It has made me crazy and freaked out by playing those meaningless songs that a few composers are known for.It has made me sing and dance though I am not very good at either of them. It has made me smile and laugh by playing all those sweet-nothings that people have to say to the love of their lives. (Yeah I still remain to be a die hard romantic. I still love the feeling of love though I myself haven’t found the love of my life yet :)) .

Another thing I like about the radio is the fact that it is so close to real life. People share their experiences and yet can remain anonymous to the world. Many a times listening to these people speak and share their experiences helps you solve your life’s problems. There is an instant connection between you and the person on air and the best part is that there are less chances of being  judgmental because most of the times we judge another person by what we see and not by what we hear.

Cheers to the RJs who have to wag their tongues constantly for keeping us entertained :) I wish the time comes soon when you guys get the same recognition as our television artists because you are no less. A special mention here, thanks a lot MJ Prithvi ( For people who don’t know him, he is one of the RJs on 94.3 Radio One, Bangalore and his is the show I listen to every morning) for being a complete entertainment package. Great job dude. Rock On!!!

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