How to create a traffic jam when it comes to your blog traffic.

Friends: Friends come in handy when you are new to blogging and even afterwards. Pester them, blackmail them, bribe them. Do not worry much about CBI/Lokayukta/Lokpal(incase it gets accepted) because they all are currently busy with their own issues. In case the above said ideas don’t work, then just use the tried and tested method which is “Tum apne dost ke liye itna nahi kar sakthe? ( Can you not do even this much for your friend?)”. Make sure you add in a little melodrama when you ask them the above question. If you are bad at it, then you can take a course in it by watching any of the Saas-Bahu serials. Make sure you don’t overact. It can prove to be addictive.

After all, Har ek friend zaroori hota hain like Airtel rightly puts it.

Family: Once again, pester them, blackmail them and do not bribe them since you would be using their own money to bribe them in case you are still studying and if you are earning, they would feel like you are showing off. So no bribing. Puppy face can do the trick. If you are bad at making faces, most of them are not. In case you are among the selected few who are bad at making faces in general and puppy face in particular, then Google puppy face and see the expression and practice the same in front of a mirror. Practice makes a man perfect you know. Try it out, no harm.

After all, family comes first.

Facebook and Twitter: Thanks to these social networking sites, life has become so much more impersonal. Every Tom, Dick and Harry knows every other Eena, Meena and Deeka. Post all updates about your blog on these and ‘some’ people are so used to clicking on the ‘like’ and ‘share’ button that they would be tempted to click on it anyways even without reading the posts. Seeing the number of likes and shares, some actual reader might read your blog and so the job gets done anyway.

After all, sharing is caring.

Spread the word: Try talking about your blog to everyone you meet , so much so that the other person should get so irritated that he/she will want to have a look at your blog to see what is so special about it. Liking your blog, following it is secondary. Atleast, your page-view stats stand increased.

After all, Dimag ki dahi nikhalna is not a bachho ka khel.

Optimizing post titles using SEOs: Have post titles that have no relation to the actual post just for the SEO to work its magic. And tadaaa… your blog has a better rank in the web world irrespective of what you post.

After all, web is what you make of it.

Disclaimer: This is just a light hearted post. No reference to anyone anywhere.

Confession: I also have tried these tricks when I was very new to blogging.

Conclusion: The above said tricks do not work. If you are truly passionate about blogging and want ‘actual readers’ to read your blog and follow it, then there is ‘one and only, tried and tested and proven method’ - Write passionately. It will surely strike a chord somewhere. Till then, Happy Blogging.

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Random…

I am feeling very restless today. I have no idea what is going on in my mind. Not one stable thought, but, a mixture of them, each trying to compete with the other to make their presence felt strongly. Aaargh… Maybe it is just a reminder that life can be a tough task master inspite of being worthfully carved.

• Assumptions can prove to be so fatal. This is something I have learnt after facing the misgivings of “assuming” a few things. Great lesson learnt. It has taught me not to assume but instead ask and clarify.
• The thin line between appearing confident and appearing arrogant. I am super scared when it comes to this. I try not to appear arrogant but it so happens that I still appear a little arrogant when my confidence levels are a little high. I need to work on this pretty soon.
• The need to say “Thank You” and “Sorry”. I believe in this completely. There are times when out of the blue, I tell people thanks and sorry. They think it might be the usual dose of craziness I suffer from sometimes, but, the fact is I can never stop myself from saying the above two words when I really feel like they should be said, even if it is in the middle of the night…I just need to express my gratitude and my apologies when I feel like. Thanks to all those who understand the reason why I do this and sorry to all those who get irritated when I do this.
• Sing even if you don’t know how to sing and dance even if you don’t know how to dance. I was listening to music the other day in the bus while travelling to office and I had such a strong urge to just dance joyfully. I don’t know how to dance nor do I know how to sing. But, when am happy I still sing and dance. It gives me great joy. So what I did was I came back home that day and sang and danced away to glory. Felt awesome. Looking forward to more such times.
• Trust-hmm. I have no idea why we tend to trust people so soon. We just can’t help but trust a few people because they seem so endearing. We make them friends so soon and then tuppp the bubble breaks and we feel like first line idiots. It happens to all of us many a times. But that doesn’t stop us from trusting the others who are genuinely trustworthy. I will leave this topic here since I have nothing more to say about this. I always go by my intuition when it comes to trust and yeah sometimes my intuition does go wrong. But all is well if a lesson is learnt.
• The need to market oneself. It is very important to market yourself, the person you are, the things you do, because, no one knows you better than yourself and the other person will know about all you do only when you market yourself well. Then comes the time to prove your worth. But, before that, you need to market yourself and your skills. That is when you get the opportunity to prove your worth. I guess my marketing skills need much more polishing. I seem to be pretty bad at it. Let me prove it. I keep posting updates about my blog on facebook–my idea of marketing my blog; still, I have only three followers out of the 150 friends I have on facebook. Pretty bad stats. Is it because my blog is so “thoughtless” or is it that my marketing skills are so weak? I need to do something about this very soon. My “to-do” list seems to be getting longer.
• The need to invest to take care of our mind’s well-being. We all invest our finances for our general well-being. I will do that too. But, I feel I need to invest in something else that I know will keep my mind relaxed and peaceful at the end of the day, because, at the end of it, all that we need from life is a life worth living. I have decided to invest a part of my money in books every month so that I can have my own little library at home. Another thing that is on my wishlist is to have a vegetable and fruit garden at home, even if it is on a smaller scale. Hope and pray I can let this happen.
• Memories never fade. I miss a few people very much-Friends, teachers and a few others, in no particular order. I try not to, but, it never happens. I still end up missing them. I wish I could go back to those times whenever needed, to childhood times, school and college days and re-live those moments and cherish them much more than before. There is a song from Lakshya that perfectly suits what am feeling. It goes like this-

Kitni baatein yaad aati hai
Tasveerein si ban jaati hain
Main kaise inhein bhooloon
Dil ko kya samjhaaun

PS: I know there is no connection between each topic I have bulleted, but, like I said there was not one thought that was constant on my mind. They are just what they seem like….RANDOM.

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